sick

sick sick sick.


I had this rotten fever + ache combo Sunday evening through Monday... not particularly high, as fevers go, but I felt terrible. As in, I was lying there thinking "Well, this could be swine flu. These might be my last few days on earth... I'VE WASTED MY LIFE!"

Lots of feverish apologies to Jen and Jed for being hard to deal with, etc.

In the words of John Cleese "I got better".

Well, actually, I felt so much better after the fever was gone that I sort of ignored the stopped up sinuses and drainage. After two days of coughing, and with Jed running a mild fever, we decided that we should go to the doctor.

If you move to the UK, I'd suggest setting up a GP before you get sick, as it's not fun to think about once you're actually unwell. We took a look at the NHS website, found the closest doctor's office - which they call a "surgery" - and gave them a call at 9AM. They were taking new patients, and said they could see us that morning at 10:15. If we got there at 10 we could fill out the paperwork.

The paperwork consisted of.... writing down my name, Jed's name, and our address. The doctor saw us right away - and since Jed and I had the same thing, we both went in together. A discussion of the symptoms, we both got an examination, and then a prescription for antibiotics.

I'd heard a lot of horror stories about the NHS - and undoubtedly it does have its drawbacks - but my experience was really pleasant. The staff seemed competent, they were nice to deal with, and, unlike Brooklyn, I didn't have to take a train to get there. We'll see how future interactions go, but this was a pretty good intro.

Ham Sandwiches and veggie stock

Making veggie stock:

I've started throwing all my carrot and onion peels, plus whatever other veggie scraps are leftover from preparing dinners, and tossing them in a tupperware on the counter. By the end of the week I usually have enough sitting there to make stock. So, into the cast-iron casserole they go, along with some herbs, garlic, onion, and maybe a little carrot and celery. Add water and pop in the oven at 150 C for a couple hours. It warms up the kitchen nicely, smells great, and gets one more use out of stuff I would previously just toss into the garbage.

Jed helps prepare some carrots. That's a butter knife.

We got some lovely ham at the farmers' market on Wed. I wasn't originally going to get any meat, but Jed tried some of their samples, and then said "Ham? Ham? Ham? Ham?" while I picked out the vegetables. I though it'd be a nice treat for him, so we headed back over to their table and bought a couple thick slices. The farm's called "Animal Farm", according to their sign, which, though a correct description of their work, made me think of "Two Legs Good, Four Legs Bad" and other slogans.

I was trying to think up other adaptations of Orwellian phrases for the farmers' market:

"If you want a vision of the future, imagine a beet stamping on a human face - forever."


"Big Butter is watching you"

"We have always been at war with Yeastasia"

Orwell also said "Advertising is the rattling of a stick inside a swill bucket " which sums up my attempts there pretty well.


So, here's the ham, along with homemade sourdough, Colman's Mustard, and a jar of Stilton. I sliced the ham super-thin, since that slice is probably 1.5 cm thick, and got two lunches worth of sandwiches for the kid and I out of the two slices.

boozy tarts and other edibles

So, Jen's off to India for 10 days. While she's off sampling the delights of the Curry Mothership, I'll be consoling myself with boozy tart.


This is one I didn't make myself - our upstairs neighbor brought some down for the boy and I to check out. And let me tell you, it is pretty good. Pretty, pretty good.

I didn't ask them for the recipe yet, but I know it's got cider brandy and golden syrup in it. Can't go wrong there!  Not sure if this is exactly it, but it seems pretty close:

• 250g plain flour plus extra for dusting
• 1 large egg, beaten
• 180g caster sugar
• 125g unsalted butter, softened
• filling
• 100g cooked, peeled chestnuts, roughly chopped
• 150g hazelnuts, roughly chopped
• 150g walnuts, roughly chopped
• ¼ tsp salt
• 1tsp vanillla essence
• 100g unsalted butter, melted
• 120ml cider brandy, such as Somerset Pomona
• 220g golden syrup
• 200g soft brown sugar
• 3 medium eggs, beaten

 

1. First, make the pastry. In a food processor or by hand, cream the butter and caster sugar together until fluffy. Slowly add the beaten egg until well mixed, then fold in the flour. Mould the dough into a ball and wrap in clingfilm; chill for 30 minutes.
2. To make the filling, blitz all the ingredients, except the nuts, in a food processor until smooth. Fold in the nuts and mix well.
3. Roll the sweet pastry on a floured table to 5mm thick. It is delicate, so go carefully. Grease a large 25cm tart tin, line the tin with the pastry, trim the edges and refrigerate for about 1 hour.
4. Preheat the oven to 180C/gas 5. Fill the tart with the nut mix; bake for 20–25 minutes until golden. Leave to cool before cutting.

Serve with vanilla ice cream, crème fraîche or cream.

So, how was it? Here's Jed's reaction:

 Golden Syrup is interesting stuff: it's a byproduct of sugar refining, is about the consistency of Karo, but has a more complex flavor. We have a can in the cabinet; it's potent stuff!

I used it to make this school treacle sponge:

• 6 overloaded, oozing tbsp of golden syrup
• 100g butter, plus extra for the dish
• 100g sugar
• 2 eggs
• ½ tsp vanilla
• 100g self-raising flour
• custard, to serve 

1. Butter a 1-litre baking dish, and dollop the syrup in the bottom. Put the butter and sugar in a food processor and blitz until pale. Beat in the eggs one by one, then the vanilla. Add the flour and pulse until just mixed. Scrape into the dish, on top of the syrup.
2. Bake in the oven at 180C/fan 160C/gas 4 oven for 30 minutes until risen and golden. Serve with lashings of custard.

Not sure why "lashings" means "lots" - there's probably some interesting etymology behind why "quantity" would share a homonym with "savage beating" but that's English for you.


Chowhound has some suggestions as to where you can find Lyle's Golden Syrup in the states, or possible substitutions.

One of the comments in that Chowhound thread states that Golden Syrup is an ingredient in John Thorne's pecan pie recipe. John Thorne is one of my favorite cooking writers; if you have not read his stuff, do yourself a big favor and check it out.

• 200g/7oz full-flavoured brown sugar (eg muscovado)
• 3 eggs
• 14 teaspoon salt
• 200ml/7fl oz Tate & Lyle's Golden Syrup
• 230g/8oz broken pecan nuts
• 2 tablespoons premium dark rum
• a 23cm/9in unbaked shortcrust pie shell
• 55g/2oz butter
• whipped cream for topping

Preheat the oven to 350F/180C/Gas Mark 4. In a large saucepan, heat the sugar, golden syrup, rum and butter to boiling point. Stirring constantly and scraping back any foam that clings to the side of the pan, let this mixture boil for about a minute. Remove from the heat and let cool while you beat the eggs until creamy in a separate bowl.

When the boiled syrup has cooled, beat in the eggs, salt and the broken pecan nuts. Pour into the unbaked pie shell. Bake for about 50 minutes, or until a skewer inserted into the centre of the pie comes out clean. Cool on a rack, and serve at room temperature with plenty of unsweetened whipped cream.

 Bread baking, continued:

I've been working on this sourdough ferment, and it's coming along pretty well. I add a splash or two to most breads that I make now, as well as some of the whey from this massive cheesemaking last week. I'm making a smaller loaf on a daily or every-other-day basis.

It goes a little something like this:

300g flour - I vary this up, depending on how i'm feeling.  A mix of organic plain white, strong white breadflour, whole meal, and rye flours. 

1/2 tsp yeast

1/2 tsp salt

Stir these together. Add

210 g fluid - water, whey, sourdough starter, or a combo of all three.

Stir well. it should be pretty sticky. I usually use a bench scraper to get this whole mass together, then I put a shower cap over the bowl and let sit for a couple hours. Then I use the bench scraper again to stir it up, add a dash or two of flour to get things a bit more solid, and turn it out on the counter. Knead and add flour until it's more dough-like - the final consistency should be as sticky as a post-it note. Grease the bowl with a splash of olive oil, pop the dough back in, turning it a couple times to cover the surface with a film of oil, put the shower cap back on, and wait. when it's doubled in size, you're ready to go.

At this point I would normally make loaves, but I decided to try making naan. So i put the cast iron pan on the stove, heated it up, and when that was good and toasty, i stretched out some dough and tossed it in the pan.

 It worked amazingly well. It is by no means an authentic recipe or the same as it would be if baked in a tandoori, but it's better than the premade frozen stuff and cheaper than takeout.

Looking for an excuse to use Brandy butter?

You should be.

Christmas is the season for Mince Pies. And, if you know me, you know that "pie" is most typically followed by "a la mode." In fact, I see pie as more of a topping for ice cream than the other way around.

So I made the offhand comment one day that mince pies would be pretty good if they were served warm with ice cream, and it was one of those moments where everyone suddenly realizes you're a leper and takes a couple of nervous steps backward. I think one person said, "Gross," which was generous. I was assured that the main thing my mince pie experiences were missing was Brandy butter. What is Brandy butter? I was happy to buy some and find out.

My local store-brand Brandy butter consists of about 47% butter, 47% powdered sugar, and 6% forms of brandy (including cognac). Who feels festive now?

Saltmarsh Lamb and Mint Crisps: Pro or Con?

We were discussing British Cuisine the other day at work, and I made some comment to the effect that since moving to this side of the pond, I am in cheddar heaven. Maybe this is what life is like in Wisconsin but, for someone who feels like all good American cheddar originates in Grafton, Vermont, UK Cheddar is the epitome of everything I had ever hoped for in a cheese. I prefer extra-strong cheddar, known locally as level 6.

All of which to say, my colleagues asked me to share the complimentary words. "Please let your fellow Americans know that our food isn't terrible!!" was the rallying cry. And so, out of deference to my British colleagues, I offer you this humble list pro and con list of British food from my current vantage point, two months in.

Jen's Pros

• Cheddar (see above)
• Mustard. Mustard here is really very good. It's strong, approaching high-quality German mustard even in it's most mundane forms. Even the store brand mustard is really good. And Colman's Mustard is basically wasabi.

Needless to say, Dave really, really likes Colman's. Then I found this vintage Colman's ad, which is just uncanny.

Uncanny, assuming that the idea of Dave playing cricket makes sense to you.

• Biscuits. I've never been shy about my love of cookies, but they take it to a whole new level with one kind of biscuit in particular: The dark chocolate covered shortbreads, with the milk chocolate covered ones in a close second. In a different league altogether (because they're Belgian) are the Jules DeStrooper Stroop Waffle. Note, these have a thin layer of caramel in the middle. Sheer joy!!!

• Meat pie. I never thought I'd come around on this one, but it's really good. Maybe it's the shortbread crust and the quantity of gravy involved, but man is meat pie good. In all its forms, including Cornish Pasty. Meat pie. Mmmmmm.
• Whiskey. I've really come around to the peaty thing. I also think it helps that pretty much all of the labels feel like they were designed by Thomas Jefferson in the Monticello library. (They don't look like they were designed by him, mind you, but maybe like they wish they were.)

Jen's Cons

• No tofu. I have to go to the specialty Asian grocery store to get tofu. They don't have it at the grocery stores here (that I've seen), which I attribute to the crazy quantities of meat everywhere--especially sausage.
• No decent coffee. Whole-bean coffee is particularly tricky at the grocery store, where there isn't too much selection in this regard. I think coffee is a delicacy here. Read that sentence again. The mind boggles.
• Mediocre beer. This isn't just about the cask ale thing, as I actually have come to really like cask ale in this cold weather. It's about the mouthfeel, which is often a bit watery compared to some of the American microbrews by which I have been spoiled. It turns out American beer is just much stronger than British beer. No wonder Guinness is the best-known beer outside the country, as it's one of the tastiest ones within it.

Dave's Pros
I'm not foolish enough to weigh in on everything Dave loves here, but there are a couple of items worth noting.

• Wine Gums. They're just gummies, like gummie bears or Swedish fish, but called wine gums. They are shaped like names of wine (e.g., Bordeaux, port) but are not flavored like wine. They're just plain gummies. He thinks they are amazing. I cannot make heads or tails of this.
• Meat-flavored crisps. Tonight's flavor was Saltmarsh Lamb and Mint. He loved them. "Wonky" seems more apt to me.

Making Gin

So, I had this idea after we saw the Sipsmiths' tasting table at the store. Sipsmiths is a micro-distillery in London - apparently the first copper-pot distillery to open in 200 years. The gin was nice, too, and not too badly priced.

I thought I would look into what, exactly, gin is. Whisky or whiskey is grain-based: corn, barley, rye, etc. bourbon is made from corn. I bet you can guess what rye whiskey is made from. Brandy or grappa is distilled wine. I knew gin had juniper berries in it, but how is it made? Ferment the berries? To the internets!

Turns out it's neutral spirits (grain-based, again) with botanicals added. I guess every distillery has their own version, so here's what I tried:


take a liter bottle of vodka - i used smirnoff red, as it was on sale at the store -

add 2 Tablespoons juniper berries. Let soak overnight.

The following morning, add

3/4 tsp coriander seed
1/4 tsp allspice
1/4 tsp fennel seed
3 green cardamom pods
2 black peppercorns
1 bay leaf, torn into pieces
1/2 tsp rosemary
1/2 tsp lavender
1 piece of lemon peel, roughly a 2 inch square.

Let this soak all day. strain out the bits that night and enjoy.


if I was doing it again i would definitely use a mason jar or something and make up a little packet with the spices, fold up a coffee filter into a little teabag and staple it shut.

filtering all the stuff out was a big pain because i didn't have a strainer or anything, ended up pouring into another bottle through a fork, then pouring back through the fork into the first bottle, then dumping the rest into a mixing bowl and then pouring THAT through the french press screen into a wineglass, then into the bottle.

Only spilled about an ounce that way, but still, unnecessary if you go with the packet method.

Two loaves of bread, made for Thanksgiving dinner. 

Left: salami-cheddar bread

Right: Spotted Dick, aka raisin bread

Somehow no other Thanksgiving photos survived. My excuse is going to be that I was busy in the kitchen all afternoon and evening. Little tip for those of you out at home - if your cranberry stuffing has too many cranberries, the chicken will look like it's not cooked for a long time. a looooooong looooooooooooong time. I kept waiting for the juices to run clear; finally we cut up the bird to cook bits individually in a skillet, and figured out what was really going on. The whole cavity was pink from cranberries. Oh well. Eating an hour later than planned was not the end of the world.

The week after, I decided to try my hand at a traditional meat pie. It's cold, so I like having kitchen projects that involve a lot of cooking. First off I started a pot of vegetable stock - step one was caramelizing onions in the cast-iron casserole, then adding carrot, parsnip and onion peels, the ends of some celery, and a bit of garlic. After the vegetables were in, I filled the casserole 2/3rds full of water, covered it, and put it in the oven at 110 C for 4 hours.

While that was cooking, i prepared the other ingredients.

yep, lard.

I dredged the chunks of pork in flour, with a pinch of salt and black pepper, then fried them in a cast iron skillet with a teaspoon of oil per batch. I tried butter, lard, vegetable and olive oil. The butter produced the best looking results. I only did about 5 or 6 chunks at a time, to prevent overcrowding and steaming the meat. Too much moisture makes grey meat, rather than the nice crispy brown stuff.

Meat transferred to a metal bowl

When the vegetable stock was done, I took it out of the oven, poured the contents through a strainer, threw out the veggies and poured the stock back into the casserole. At that point I added oregano, sage, a dash of fennel, cumin, a pinch of chilis and black pepper.

Here we have the homemade vegetable stock, plus spices

While the meat was browning, I sliced up some chestnut mushrooms.  When the meat was done, I transferred it to the bowl, turned the heat down, and added the mushrooms. I let the mushrooms brown a bit, then added them to the stock.

Like so.

Then I added a parsnip, three carrots, two and a half stalks of celery, and one leek to the stock, added the meat chunks, and turned the burner up to high. While that cooked for about 10 minutes, I buttered and floured a pie dish, and lined it with puff pastry.

Then the stock+veggies+meat were added to the pie. 

And then I cut strips of dough from the leftovers and made a crosshatch pattern on top, popped it in the oven for 20 minutes...

 

and there you go.



+++++++++++++++++++++++++++

In his amazing cookbook Mouth Wide Open, John Thorne has a recipe for "pasta in a bag"; basically the point is that by cooking the pasta in sauce, in a paper bag, you trap the moisture and keep a thick sauce that infuses flavor into the noodles. So I tried something similar, only with this little star pasta and in a casserole dish, not a paper bag.

First off. chop some onions finely, brown them in butter, and add the leftovers from a carton of tomato juice that seemed like a good idea when you were getting a cold and wanted vitamins, but then you ended up just eating ramen with an egg in it instead. Since this particular tomato juice was really thick, thin the juice with water until it's about the consistency of fresh squeezed OJ. Add pepper and the stellette. I put in some oregano (good idea) and fennel (not so good. Do not do this with fennel unless you're adding sausage.)

I covered the pot with a lid and let it boil for about 5 minutes, then took off the lid and started stirring. I wanted to get almost a risotto-like texture, where the pasta releases starch out into the sauce.

 

 

It worked pretty well - if I'd made this without the fennel I would have been ecstatic. With the fennel, it was okay but not phenomenal. I thought the fennel was kind of distracting, actually.

Whatever, Jed was really into it, so I'll count that as a partial success. 

"Stellette"

Fun fact: you can make bacon sausage. All you need is a meat grinder, a kilo of bacon collar joint., and some elbow grease. And probably a crash cart, nurse, and blood thinners if you heat more than three. I could feel my heart slowing down as I ate these.